LIQUOR STORE SIMULATOR REVIEW - WHERE YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT IS ALSO YOUR CURSE
Ever wondered what it would be like to run your own business, only to discover that your single greatest accomplishment was also the key to your eternal damnation? Well, Liquor Store Simulator is here to pour you a tall glass of that exact existential dread, and trust me, it has a bitter aftertaste.
A Surprisingly Zen Start
I'll be honest, the first few hours are pure, distilled relaxation. It’s the perfect “turn your brain off” game. There’s a simple, meditative joy in the routine: ordering stock, neatly arranging bottles of "Soda Puppy" on the shelves, and painting my walls a shade of purple so offensive it could probably be weaponized. The core loop is solid. You check IDs, catch teenagers with hilariously fake ones, and slowly watch your little corner store grow. It’s the kind of chill, low-stakes capitalism that’s perfect for listening to a podcast or just zoning out after a long day. The progression feels good, and for a while, I felt like a true beverage baron.
The Draft Beer Deathtrap
And then it happened. After hours of grinding, I finally saved up enough cash to unlock the holy grail: the draft beer tap. This was it. The upgrade that would turn my humble shop into a real destination. I installed it with glee, imagining the profits pouring in. The reality was a waking nightmare. My employees, who I pay a handsome wage, would rather get stuck on a doorframe than pour a single pint. They refuse to work the tap. That meant I, the proud owner, was now chained to it permanently. The game instantly morphed from a management sim into "Bartender Simulator: Hell's Own Taproom." I became a prisoner in the very palace I built, spending every single day pulling pints for an endless line of dead-eyed customers while my other duties piled up. I don't just regret unlocking it; I want to rip it out of the wall and throw it into the sun.
My Employees Are On Strike (Mentally)
When my staff isn't actively ignoring the most profitable part of the store, they're staging a masterclass in inefficiency. The restocking AI is a sight to behold. I've watched, mesmerized, as two of my employees grab the exact same case of beer, waddle over to the same shelf, and then after the first one stocks it, the second one just shrugs, turns around, and walks back to the warehouse with the now-useless box. I'm not just paying for labor; I'm paying for performance art about the futility of existence.
The Bottom Shelf
Once the initial charm wears off and you've made peace with your fate as a cursed bartender, other cracks start to show. The late-game economy is brutal. Upgrades suddenly jump to prices so absurd you'd think the shelves were made of solid gold. The game becomes a serious grind, and the loop of stocking and selling gets stale when there’s no meaningful goal left to reach. It’s a solid foundation, but it’s missing that extra shot of content—more decorations, more customer interactions, anything—to keep it interesting in the long run.
The Verdict
Liquor Store Simulator is like a good, cheap beer: it’s surprisingly enjoyable for a while and gets the job done if you’re looking to relax. But it has a single, glaring flaw that can give you a massive headache and make you regret your choices. It's a fun, casual sim that tragically punishes you for success. My advice? Enjoy the simple life of a package store owner, and for the love of all that is holy, stay away from the draft beer.
Score: 6.5/10 - A chill retail sim that accidentally simulates your own personal hell.
We at NLM received a key for this game for free, this however didn't impact our review in any way.